FASHION > FASHION FUCK-UP
Bizzaro Bazaar | 2009-01-30
Girls who thought they could kill with their looks
The Bitch loves digging out the dead at times. She just doesn‘t like it when people forget the horrific experiences we‘ve had in the past for the mere reason that we don‘t want history to be repeated.
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In the 90s, there was a breed of some voluptuous actresses who dared to kiss the arc lights. Yes, there were zillions of them who came and shattered the concept of fashion and disappeared.
We want them to come back again and give us an explanation for playing with our emotions.
We gunned down five such criminals.
SHEEBA
Yes the same Sheeba who vowed to speak only through her nose and donned costumes that scared the darkness of the night.
Take a look. Overdose of some orange concoction.Too much. The hat is downright ugly and that thing that pretends to be a flower should have been pulled out at once.
She tries to look pretty and young with the plaits but alas! She fails. Some cheap/fake beads...I apologize; golden beads adorn her hardly visible cleavage.
One can‘t actually figure out the shirt or top or kurta or whatever it is that covers the bust. The sleeves have been torn away brutally; the loose strings stand testimony to that. She went ahead and dipped the same golden beads in orange marmalade and used them on her ear rings.
And before we go on to the next, don‘t miss her lipstick. Yikes!
NAGMA
Isn‘t that the biggest we‘ve seen in years? We agree. The superstar (of Bhojpuri films mind you, don‘t get ideas) who had bigger eyeballs than her face gave the fashion cops sleepless nights.
She knew she never had the oomph factor and had made efforts to reach close to it. What do we see here? The wet wet look silly. The pants are up her jelly belly with no scope for a belt at all.
One can see a pair of helmets inside that have quickly been covered with a khakee transi shirt. Poor kitten, she hates the rain. It makes things so obvious.
RAMYA
Aiyo rama! That‘s Ramya. The one who played an NRI in Banarasi Babu and enthralled the nation ! The Bitch recommends the film strongly. You‘ll die laughing.
This tornado travelled all the way from the land of ‘idli saambhar‘ thinking she‘ll serve the same dishes here. But no one was interested.
She was as huge as a bungalow and made us realize that the tummy could directly touch the bum. Ya, she didn‘t have a waist . Surf board fabs!
The track pants or skirt (we‘re not sure) could have easily gone up to her neck had she pulled it . Then why didn‘t she? She could‘ve saved the money to buy the tacky blouse she‘s wearing.
And we‘re sure a bird has laid eggs on the nest on her head. She‘s so hot, they‘ll hatch...like now. Spare us Rams.
RAMBHA
She was easily Ramya‘s successor. Everyone compared her to Sridevi and Divya Bharti. Some said she was Sri‘s estranged sis. Rumour mills you know. She debuted with Mithun in an epic called ‘Jallad‘. And the bubble burst. Lousy she was.
Girls from the south ...what‘s with them? So she snipped a pullover and the top was ready ! But the sleeves?
How many bullets did they face ? We‘re counting. The jeans have a huge white rose stitched on to it. Where did it fall from?
The army bandana, so passe. Check out the glares. She went all the way to some Naagpanchmi Mela and bargained for it.
Poor thing.
AYESHA JHULKA
Better than the rest , Ayesha had an average career. But that doesn‘t discount her ghastly sartorial sense. Which zebra crossing did she lie on to get the imprint?
Or did she keep jumping in and out of tubs containing black and white paint? She would know best.
Quickly look at the horse‘s mane literally flowing out of her magician hat. How many horses did she kill? We‘re writing to PETA right away. The lady forgot to match her nail paint to her dress.
She should at once disappear into her magician hat. Go...vanish.
The Bitch feels like vanishing now, after all the painful scrutiny. Let her go for an evening walk now, she needs it.
The weekend‘s here. Be good and bitch around.
Girls who thought they could kill with their looks
The Bitch loves digging out the dead at times. She just doesn‘t like it when people forget the horrific experiences we‘ve had in the past for the mere reason that we don‘t want history to be repeated.
In the 90s, there was a breed of some voluptuous actresses who dared to kiss the arc lights. Yes, there were zillions of them who came and shattered the concept of fashion and disappeared.
We want them to come back again and give us an explanation for playing with our emotions.
We gunned down five such criminals.
SHEEBA
Yes the same Sheeba who vowed to speak only through her nose and donned costumes that scared the darkness of the night.
Take a look. Overdose of some orange concoction.Too much. The hat is downright ugly and that thing that pretends to be a flower should have been pulled out at once.
She tries to look pretty and young with the plaits but alas! She fails. Some cheap/fake beads...I apologize; golden beads adorn her hardly visible cleavage.
One can‘t actually figure out the shirt or top or kurta or whatever it is that covers the bust. The sleeves have been torn away brutally; the loose strings stand testimony to that. She went ahead and dipped the same golden beads in orange marmalade and used them on her ear rings.
And before we go on to the next, don‘t miss her lipstick. Yikes!
NAGMA
Isn‘t that the biggest we‘ve seen in years? We agree. The superstar (of Bhojpuri films mind you, don‘t get ideas) who had bigger eyeballs than her face gave the fashion cops sleepless nights.
She knew she never had the oomph factor and had made efforts to reach close to it. What do we see here? The wet wet look silly. The pants are up her jelly belly with no scope for a belt at all.
One can see a pair of helmets inside that have quickly been covered with a khakee transi shirt. Poor kitten, she hates the rain. It makes things so obvious.
RAMYA
Aiyo rama! That‘s Ramya. The one who played an NRI in Banarasi Babu and enthralled the nation ! The Bitch recommends the film strongly. You‘ll die laughing.
This tornado travelled all the way from the land of ‘idli saambhar‘ thinking she‘ll serve the same dishes here. But no one was interested.
She was as huge as a bungalow and made us realize that the tummy could directly touch the bum. Ya, she didn‘t have a waist . Surf board fabs!
The track pants or skirt (we‘re not sure) could have easily gone up to her neck had she pulled it . Then why didn‘t she? She could‘ve saved the money to buy the tacky blouse she‘s wearing.
And we‘re sure a bird has laid eggs on the nest on her head. She‘s so hot, they‘ll hatch...like now. Spare us Rams.
RAMBHA
She was easily Ramya‘s successor. Everyone compared her to Sridevi and Divya Bharti. Some said she was Sri‘s estranged sis. Rumour mills you know. She debuted with Mithun in an epic called ‘Jallad‘. And the bubble burst. Lousy she was.
Girls from the south ...what‘s with them? So she snipped a pullover and the top was ready ! But the sleeves?
How many bullets did they face ? We‘re counting. The jeans have a huge white rose stitched on to it. Where did it fall from?
The army bandana, so passe. Check out the glares. She went all the way to some Naagpanchmi Mela and bargained for it.
Poor thing.
AYESHA JHULKA
Better than the rest , Ayesha had an average career. But that doesn‘t discount her ghastly sartorial sense. Which zebra crossing did she lie on to get the imprint?
Or did she keep jumping in and out of tubs containing black and white paint? She would know best.
Quickly look at the horse‘s mane literally flowing out of her magician hat. How many horses did she kill? We‘re writing to PETA right away. The lady forgot to match her nail paint to her dress.
She should at once disappear into her magician hat. Go...vanish.
The Bitch feels like vanishing now, after all the painful scrutiny. Let her go for an evening walk now, she needs it.
The weekend‘s here. Be good and bitch around.
Comments (8)
Sheeba in Suryvanshi
Hello,
You should check sheeba out in the really funny Salman Khan starrer "Suryavanshi"...She could not even mouth her dialogues. It sounded as if she is whispering...not speaking...And man how she dances..how she dances ha ha ha..you will piss yourself laughing...Amrita Singh looked more interesting then her in this movie. | bella
Hello,
You should check sheeba out in the really funny Salman Khan starrer "Suryavanshi"...She could not even mouth her dialogues. It sounded as if she is whispering...not speaking...And man how she dances..how she dances ha ha ha..you will piss yourself laughing...Amrita Singh looked more interesting then her in this movie. | bella
Rambha and Ramya were ok till they were saying aiyooo and eating idli saambhar ...only when they went to north saying haaaanji naaaaaahhhji and started eating aloo paratha they started looking like alooo and fat parathas...:D Love u Bitch!!! | idli saambhar
damn ur jaundiced view
Urm..ramya krishna is not from tamil nadu( idly sambar land in ur opinion), she‘s from Andhra Pradesh( wich is NOT idly sambar land by any means). They are two very different states. U can bitch on, but atleast get ur geography right. Wat is wid dim witted northies!..always labouring under the delusion that all south indians are "madrasis" who speak tamil! Madrasi is an extremely offensive term and ppl wud do better to avoid it(even if u r a website like this, whose main forte is outrageousness). | fashionista
Urm..ramya krishna is not from tamil nadu( idly sambar land in ur opinion), she‘s from Andhra Pradesh( wich is NOT idly sambar land by any means). They are two very different states. U can bitch on, but atleast get ur geography right. Wat is wid dim witted northies!..always labouring under the delusion that all south indians are "madrasis" who speak tamil! Madrasi is an extremely offensive term and ppl wud do better to avoid it(even if u r a website like this, whose main forte is outrageousness). | fashionista
FYI:- Idly sambar is actually not even really Madrasi, it is more of a Kannada dish. Idli sambar introduced to us by the Upidi restuarants (in Bombay) run by Shetty‘s mostly hail from Udupi region of Karnataka and it‘s their native food. | Sonali
foul and crap
In such trying times after an attack on the most cosmopolitan city in the country, this person who calls herself B**** is trying to create rift by demonising the southies. She is a Raj Thackeray in disguise. This is not the first time I have seen this person criticize the southies. Give it up. You stink. | ss
In such trying times after an attack on the most cosmopolitan city in the country, this person who calls herself B**** is trying to create rift by demonising the southies. She is a Raj Thackeray in disguise. This is not the first time I have seen this person criticize the southies. Give it up. You stink. | ss
All south Indian aren‘t Tamil!!
Jeez bitch get ure facts right. This goes to all north Indians who think that south Indians are all Tamil and only eat idly sambar. After Hindi, Telugu is second most spoken. Language in India, NOT Tamil. And south Indians don‘t go abt saying ayyyo or whatever sh*t. It‘s disgraceful and disgusting to see that‘s indians don‘t know abt their own country. | indian
Jeez bitch get ure facts right. This goes to all north Indians who think that south Indians are all Tamil and only eat idly sambar. After Hindi, Telugu is second most spoken. Language in India, NOT Tamil. And south Indians don‘t go abt saying ayyyo or whatever sh*t. It‘s disgraceful and disgusting to see that‘s indians don‘t know abt their own country. | indian
When I was in Kerala, everyone called me a North Indian and I am a Maharashtrian. Why is our country so delusional? In the US, Indians do not meet each other as Indians only as gujjus, bongs, tamils, malayalees, punjabis, etc etc etc. I am so sick of this groupism even outside India. For people like me who have married outside our state, there is no hope. We are dhobhi ka kutta, na ghar ka na ghat ka. | TM
excuse me
well...this is one country and anybody who has talent can get into any industry anywhere....whether northies or southies....the ‘bitch‘ seems to have forgotten that South Indian actresses have done very well in the Hindi film industry for years and years.....right from Vyjayanthimala, Padmini, Waheeda Rahman, Laxmi, Rekha, Hema Malini, Jaya Prada, Sreedevi, Meenakshi Sheshadri, Tabu, Shilpa Shetty, Aiswarya Rai, Vidya Balan, Deepika Padukone, Sameera Reddy, Amrita Rao right down to Asin....all are from South India...not just Rambha and Ramya Krishna.....and implying that all South Indians eat idli sambhar all the time is as ignorant a statement as saying that all North Indians eat aloo paratha all the time...just not true.....bitching is fine...as long as u have ur facts right ! | parvathy
well...this is one country and anybody who has talent can get into any industry anywhere....whether northies or southies....the ‘bitch‘ seems to have forgotten that South Indian actresses have done very well in the Hindi film industry for years and years.....right from Vyjayanthimala, Padmini, Waheeda Rahman, Laxmi, Rekha, Hema Malini, Jaya Prada, Sreedevi, Meenakshi Sheshadri, Tabu, Shilpa Shetty, Aiswarya Rai, Vidya Balan, Deepika Padukone, Sameera Reddy, Amrita Rao right down to Asin....all are from South India...not just Rambha and Ramya Krishna.....and implying that all South Indians eat idli sambhar all the time is as ignorant a statement as saying that all North Indians eat aloo paratha all the time...just not true.....bitching is fine...as long as u have ur facts right ! | parvathy
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